I am in unbelievable pain - new problems with the back and not up to doing this update but Someone whoever he or she is has really pissed me off on all kinds of levels.  Wanting to know if Marty "offed" himself - then when I chide the person of his or her cold way of asking and not answer his or her question, said person challenges my status as Marty's friend.

I don't owe anyone any explanations or excuses or anything else. Especially some idiot who challenges my status as Marty's friend when he or she acts like he or she has an interest in his welfare and doesn't have answers his or her self.

I have written Marty a number of times - no response. I figured if he wanted to reply he would do so in his own time. I'm not about to press him. He may not have even read my messages. I have been there, and some of you know I have not answered immediately - depression makes you withdrawn.

So no - I do not know anything about whats happened to Marty and pray he is alright. When I changed computers - I lost his blog URL and don't know where its at even.  I have problems my own self - I don't need some cavalier asshole coming here and start in with less than real concern about a friend, then start challenging me on my friends status with anyone.

I have let friends down - I am fully aware of that.  It has never been deliberately, and I do not dismiss my friend's concerns.  I fight every freaking day to find reasons to keep going.  I want to fight my way back to some form of normalcy - assholes like this are NOT helping.

 I dont discuss my depression in detail with anyone - though people (friends) have offered. I just dont do it.  I love my friends even though I haven't seemed like it. I appreciate my friends even though in my depression I have not appeared like it.  I hate what I become but what I am what I am at least for now. To my friends I offer apologies for my actions - but to this ASSHOLE - get off my back and crawl back under your rock and leave me AND Marty the hell alone.

I could ban this person - BUT - in so doing in the past banning one person somehow effected two or three others and they could not post.

Anyone knowing what has happened to Marty or having his blog URL - use the contact form below left side bar and let me know.  Thank you.

I have to get out of this chair and lay down for a while  - I cant sit very long at a time - its painful to stand very long, sit very long or even to walk very long.