I have kidnapped your precious Daveman! Muahahahaa! Not to worry. I'm not asking you for the Ransom.  HE has to pay ME - Or else! If he don't, then You WILL see him again, that much I promise. Uhm.... I mean if he does pay you will see him again .., yeah .., yeah.., thats what i meant.

But if he don't pay - He wont see himself again. Muahahahahaa! Muahahahahaa! Muahahahahaa! Muahahahahaa! Muahahahahaa! Muahahahahaa! Muahahahahaa! Muahahahahaa! Muahahahahaa! Muahahahahaa! - cough - cough - wheeeeeze .....,  AHEM!

The problem is, he says he is fine with that, no more mirrors to tend to, no appearance pressures, no fashion trends, he doesn't even want to get out and vote for any presidential candidate casting of losers.., as he put it.  No this no that. I was asking for a million dollars but he showed me his bank book so I had to reduce my demand to $5.25

The man is nuts. He's salivating on his arms as a plan to try and slip the cuffs off his wrists.  I'm not sure why he is wearing hand-cuffs, because all I did was shackle him to the wall. One of you must have furnished him with those cuffs.  And you thought I was insane? Yeah - right.

Signed
~ Kidnapper Daveman
Yeah I kidnapped myself!
it has the merit of never been
tried before. That I know of