Okay - I'm wondering if I need to stay home. Something is REALLY WRONG with me.  I'm serious.  My normal blasé days are becoming too ..., different!   Last week I get hit on by two younger women.  Thats two of them, both about 19-20 years of age, in two different locations same day. 

        They were really look-some women if I do say myself - well - the one had a really pretty face but dressed to make Trailer Trash Barby some hot competition. She was filthy as in her clothes were nasty.  The other was cleaner - but found the old "Smash the cart into mine" rouse as a preferred method of meeting men.  I don't trust women who use these measures to meet me.   Needless to say - unless they were old souls in youthful ADULT bodies and some major things in common, I don't want to waste their time or mine.  I'm too old and the clock is still ticking.

 

        Today I took me mom to Wally World's so she could do some shopping for groceries - and while I was there, far too many people were calling me "Sir", nodding hello, waving, Smiling real big and talking to me like I was somebody important or something.  I panicked, ran to the mens room to check my fly - which was in place (whew!) Next I examined my shirt in case I had it buttoned wrong - which would have been hard to do since it was a pull over shirt. Everything was in place.

        The only element I noticed in the mirror was something that I had not paid attention to before.  I actually have more gray hairs than ever! That many? Cheeze! They were NOT there last month, so what thuh...?  Is this the secret to my success lately? My gray hair?  Do men show me respect and women swoon at my very slight peppery gray haired presence?  I'm not one for attention in real life - just on this blog.

        I'm a shy guy who evades personal attention by nature.  Am I going  to be a celeb despite myself? I fear tomorrow I may see my picture on the cover of People Magazine under, "Sexiest Gray Haired Man on the Planet" and strangers will send me money for a lock of my hair while Herb gets wealthy selling my phone number to those hollywierd women with mega bux.  He knows how I hate talking on the phone, and would do this to pay me back for all those stinky jokes.

[Note To Self: Change Phone Number just in case]

 

        It's not easy being me these days. I complain about my back and knee pains - then my gray hair and BAM!  Suddenly people adore me.  Thats just not right somehow. It throws the whole universal balance of nature out of whack somehow, doesn't it?  Maybe THAT is the cause of global warming experiencing a sudden rate of acceleration.  Its just a theory I have people, so don't come pounding on my door with protest signs.  Besides - its something I cant help.  Its like a train wreck gone good.  I just cant explain it.

 

THE CAPTION CONTEST (last entry) is going good! Lots of really good captions. When the deadline approaches, I may possibly, potentially allow YOU to vote for the winner.  Yes, Its true.  YOU will select the winner, possibly.  For the moment, I am debating on grabbing a few innocent victims who are neutral and have them help me narrow it down to the top 10 - then turn you loose on each other and fight over the bones until only one is left standing.   This Caption Contesting thing isn't as easy as it seems. I will henceforth leave the regular practice up to Diesel on his blawg, and do my own caption contests periodically.  They are fun though aren't they!  I think they are.   THE CAPTION CONTEST is still open until Saturday - so if you have a good one, go ahead and throw it in now.

[NOTE: On same person Multiple Entries in the Caption Contest - I will pick the best one of those multiple entries by same person to narrow or whittle down the voting process for you peeps.]